Scene 1

(Leo is walking through the corridors and comes through Josh's bullpen where people are running around, hard at work.)

Leo: Josh!

(Donna walks up behind Leo.)

Donna: Good morning, Leo.

Leo: Hey, Donna, is he in yet?

Donna: Yeah.

(She sits down at her desk.)

Leo: Can you get him?

Donna: (shouts) Josh!

Leo: Thanks.

Donna: I heard it’s broken.

Leo: You heard wrong.

Donna: I heard--

Leo: It’s a mild sprain, he’ll be back later today.

Donna: What was the cause of the accident?

Leo: What are you, from State Farm? Go do a job, would you.

(He starts to move away towards Josh's office.)

Donna: I’m just--

Leo: He was swerving to avoid a tree.

Donna: And what happened?

Leo: He was unsuccessful.

(Josh pops out of his office and he and Leo move off.)

Scene 2

(Josh is watching the video of his debate with right-wing Christian Mary Marsh.  His insult, egged on by her, is leading many to believe that he will be fired.)

Video Mary Marsh: Not any God I pray to, Mr. Lyman. Not any God I pray to.

Video Josh: That’s ‘cause the God you pray to is too busy getting indicted for tax fraud.

(He stops the tape and rewinds it, watching that moment over again.  He is unaware that Donna has come up behind him with a coffee mug in her hand, watching him with concern.)

Donna: You shouldn’t have worn that tie on television. It bleeds.

Josh: I don’t think it’s the tie that got me in trouble.

Donna: Yeah, but I’ve told you a zillion times.

(He turns around and finally notices what she is carrying.)

Josh: What’s that?

Donna: It’s coffee.

Josh: I thought so.

Donna: I brought you some coffee.

Josh: What’s goin’ on, Donna?

Donna: Nothing’s going--

Josh: Donna--

Donna: I brought you some coffee.

Josh: Close the door.

(Donna sets down the coffee and moves to close the door, while she is doing that, Josh stands up in front of his desk and watches her.)

Josh: Donnatella Moss. When did you start working for me?

Donna: During the campaign.

Josh: And how long have you been my assistant?

Donna: A year and a half.

Josh: And when was the last time you brought me a cup of coffee?

(She doesn't say anything, but pretends to think.)

Josh: It was never. You’ve never brought me a cup of coffee.

Donna: (Goes to pick up the mug) If you’re gonna make a big deal out of--

Josh: Donna, if I get fired, I get fired.

Donna: Do you think he’s gonna do it?

(She looks at him with worry.  He wants to comfort her, but he's not sure himself if he will be fired or not. He pauses for a moment.)

Josh: No.

(There's a knock on his office door, but it doesn't open.)

Toby outside: It’s Toby.

Donna: (quietly and vehemently) You won that election for him. You and Leo and C.J. and Sam.

Toby outside: Open the damn door.

Donna: And him.

(She looks at him for a moment longer, then turns to leave, opening the door for Toby.)

Josh: Thanks for the coffee.

Donna: You’re welcome.

(Without looking back, she leaves the office, brushing by Toby.)

Toby: Donna brought you coffee?

Donna: (over her shoulder) Shut up.

(Toby steps into the office and he and Josh discuss the incident with Mary Marsh and how to correct it.)

Scene 3

(Through Josh's office door we can see Donna standing in the middle of the room holding out a clean shirt, with Josh walking around the office.)

Josh:  No.

Donna: Put it on.

Josh: No.

Donna: You’ve been wearing the same clothes for 31 hours now, Josh.

Josh: I’m not getting spruced up for these people, Donna.

Donna: All the girls think you look really hot in this shirt.

Josh: (There's a momentary pause before Josh grabs the shirt and tie) Gimme that.

(Donna leaves the office and moves into the corridor.)

Donna: (calling out) Bonnie, tell Toby he’s changing his shirt.

Scene 4

(Josh, CJ, Toby, Donna, and a few other people are walking down the corridors towards the mural room.)

CJ: She’s gonna try and bait you, Josh, you understand what I’m saying?

Josh: Lloyd Russell. Yeah that’ll last.

CJ: Are you listening to me?

Josh: They’re gonna try and bait me.

CJ: They want you to say something arrogant.

Josh: Well I don’t need baiting for that.

Toby: Hi, good afternoon.

(They arrive at the room to find the Reverend Caldwell, Mary Marsh, and John Van Dyke are there.)

Caldwell: Good afternoon.

Toby: We apologize for running a bit behind today.

Caldwell: That’s quite all right. How’s the President’s health?

CJ: It’s a mild sprain, he’ll be fine.

Caldwell: Good, good. You all know Mary Marsh and John Van Dyke.

CJ: Yes.

(Everyone says hello.)

Toby: We’re happy that you all could come talk with us today. As you know, the President makes a usual Sunday morning radio address, and in a few weeks we’ve scheduled--

Toby: When she said "New York sense of humor", she was talking about you and me.

Josh: You know what, Toby, let’s just not even go there.

Caldwell: There’s been an apology, let’s move on.

Van Dyke: I’d like to talk about why we hear so much talk about the First Amendment coming out of this building, but no talk at all about the First Commandment.

(Everyone stands up as he enters the room.)

Caldwell: Good afternoon, Mr. President.

Bartlet: Al. What do we got here, C.J.?

CJ: Well, we’ve got some hot tempers, Mr. President.

Van Dyke: Mr. President, I’m John van Dyke.

Bartlet: Yes.

Van Dyke: May I ask you a question?

Bartlet: Yes.

Van Dyke: If our children can buy pornography on any street corner for five dollars, isn’t that too high a price to pay for free speech?

Bartlet: No.

Van Dyke: (Looks a little surprised) Really?

Bartlet: On the other hand, I do think that five dollars is too high a price to pay for pornography.

CJ: Why don’t we all sit down.

Bartlet: No, let’s not. They won’t be staying that long. Al, how many times have I asked you to denounce the practices of a fringe group calls themselves The Lambs of God?

Caldwell: Sir, it’s not up to me to--

Bartlet: Crap. It is up to you.

(From the hallway, Leo, Sam and Sam's assistant Cathy enter the room quietly.)

Bartlet: My wife, Abbey, she never wants me to do anything while I’m upset. 28 years ago, I come home from a bad day at the State House. I tell Abby I’m going out for a drive. I get in the station wagon, put the car in reverse, and pull out of the garage full speed. Except I forgot to open the garage door. Abbey didn’t want me to drive while I was upset and she was right. She was right when she told me not to get on that damn bicycle when I was upset, but I did it anyway, and I guess I was about as angry as I’ve ever been in my life. It seems my granddaughter, Annie, had given an interview in one of the teen magazines. And somewhere between movie stars and make-up tips, she talked about her feelings on a woman’s right to choose. Now Annie, all of 12, has always been precocious, but she’s got a good head on her shoulders and I like it when she uses it, so I couldn’t understand when her mother called me in tears yesterday. I said, "Elizabeth, what’s wrong?" She said, "It’s Annie." Now I love my family and I’ve read my bible cover to cover so I want you to tell me: From what part of the Holy Scripture do you suppose the Lambs of God drew their Divine inspiration when they sent my 12 year-old granddaughter a Raggedy Ann doll with a knife stuck through its throat? 

(While he is talking he is walking around the room, he comes to stop in front of Al.)

Bartlet: You’ll denounce these people, Al. You’ll do it publicly. And until you do, you can all get your fat asses out of my White House.

(Everyone is frozen.)

Bartlet: Charlie, show these folks out, would you.

Mary: (Snidely) I believe we can find the door.

Bartlet: (Stares her down) Find it now.

(The 3 religious right exit the room quietly and quickly.)

Caldwell: (to Leo before he leaves) We’ll fix this.

Leo: See that you do.

(After they're gone, the President hobbles into the Oval Office and the staff follow him in.)

Josh: Okay, can I just say that, as it turned out, I was the calmest person in the room.

Toby: She was calling us New York Jews, Josh.

Bartlet: Seems to me we’ve all been taking a little break. Thinking about our personal lives or thinking about keeping our jobs. Nothing wrong with taking a break. Breaks are good, and I know how hard you all work.

(Leo hands Bartlet the note.)

Bartlet: There was this time that Annie came to me with a news clipping. Theologians in South America were very excited because a little girl in Chile had sliced open a tomato, and the flesh of the tomato spelled out a Rosary. The theologians commented that they thought this was a very impressive girl. Annie commented that she though it was a very impressive tomato. I don’t know what made me think of that.

(He puts on his glasses and reads the note.)

Bartlet: Naval Intelligence reports approximately 1200 Cubans left Havana this morning. Approximately 700 turned back due to severe weather, some 350 are missing and are presumed dead, 137 have been taken into custody in Miami and are seeking asylum. With the clothes on their backs, they came through a storm. And those that didn’t die want a better life. And they want it here. Talk about impressive. My point is this: Break’s over.

(He stops at the doorway and looks at Josh.)

Bartlet: "…too busy being indicted for tax fraud." (He pauses and stares at Josh.) Don’t ever do it again.

Josh:  Yes sir.

(Josh follows the others out and Bartlet hollers out the doorway.)

Bartlet: Mrs. Landingham.

(She appears in the doorway.)

Bartlet: What’s next?